A year ago when I decided to go forward with my blog, I began to make a routine of checking other blogs (mostly fashion, but also lifestyle) in order to gain a better understanding of what direction I wanted to take my blog in and to be honest I wanted to find inspiration.
The first rule I had for my site was to only post positive things. No matter how pissed or upset I was at something (aka dating), I wouldn’t post it. But instead something else happened: I began to notice that the more I began to follow a series of websites (FYI bloglovin is a great app for this), the more I began to appreciate women.
Lezbehonest, with Perez Hilton and other various tabloid circuits, it’s as if we almost hope for women to fail. As if we want Kim Kardashian and Jessica Simpson to get fat from their pregnancies or women from the Real Housewives of (insert city) to go bankrupt & batshit crazy while only rarely do we find sympathy or show a slight feign of attraction to women at all (& it’s typically to those we regard as America’s Sweethearts).
Let’s play a game: Ask a group of women about Lea Michele (girlfriend of the late Corey Monteith) or Kate Middleton and most women will say something extremely positive about them and hope for their success, while ask the same group of women to say something nice about Tara Reid or Lindsay Lohan and I swear their attitude will completely change. It’s sort of common knowledge that’s it’s okay to hate certain women.
This came to my attention when I came across an article in September’s Cosmopolitan (it’s a reoccurring gift from my grandmother–relax) and it talked about how women BOND over hating other women. As women we become closer by hating on other women. What the hell, when did this become a thing? I mean groups of women get together and watch RHONJ and bond over talking shit about the cast. I mean TheDirty.com gets thousands of submissions a day (I’m sure over 75% are from women).
Take for example my friend Kier, she has a fashion blog (www.fashionaddict.la) and has recently decided to document her journey with undergoing a breast augmentation surgery. I happen to think it’s a brave and an awesome tool for women to have access to if they are scared or unsure and considering the procedure themselves. While she’s actually found great support by her posts, she is also receiving a lot of negative feedback–which leaves me to question: are we all just catty bitches? Or rather have we simply allowed ourselves to become that way?
Let’s start with the fact that I’m one of these women, actually I’m a reformed bitch. I saw my transformation unfold over the past couple years when I began to create my site and follow blogs of other women I admired, and suddenly I began to feel less catty. Seriously, I was replacing hate-envy for women I was jealous of and decided life was better as a fangirl. I also decided to swap negative websites for websites that applauded personal ambitions and success. It’s that easy, and trust me it’s way more fun to like women (rawr).
And frankly, positive admiration will only make you a happier person, so don’t be a bitch (because memo: YOLO–life’s too short).
I don’t mean to preach, I just thought I’d bring to the table what no one really has, and if we all start working together, we truly can rule the world (insert beyoncé song here).
& now I’ll leave with you with a couple of websites of women who I admire incase you need a little kick in starting your new reformation (and also because they’re super fun):